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I lost my Instagram again. Unsurprising, given how hard I ..
🕑 Added 2022-05-22 16:02:37 +0000 UTC I lost my Instagram again. Unsurprising, given how hard I pushed it. Maybe I was looking to get punished. Told I didn't belong. Either way, the timing felt all too fitting. Earlier that day I had been asking myself "how can I be better using my time?" All platforms serve a purpose. I think apps can be incredibly addictive and dangerous - but we also choose how to let them into our lives. I've found it to be important to place boundaries on these places in order to be very specific about what I'm looking for from them. For me - it's work. While that can come in the form of connection and collaboration, ultimately that is work. It's also play and art and so much more, but it can become addictive. It can be too easy to fill more gaps and take on more. Opportunities are there, the net is wide and the swiping is infinite. And I can get lost in the noise and forget about the music that's already playing. The people already around me. The half-finished projects and hobbies sitting in the backs of all of our closets. The goals that don't involve looking outside or online or anywhere else. So maybe this is me being melodramatic or hyperbolic or hormonal over the second loss of a digital place, but ultimately I choose to see any death as an invitation for space. Usually I think it's to make space for something better to come in. But right now when I look around, and when I journal about it, I have a lot of good around me. I have a lot of projects to work on, relationships to invest in and ways to fill my time, wallet and dopamine. I don't always need more. Sometimes I just need to be reminded of what I have.
