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I was supposed to have an Ayahuasca ceremony for my birthday..
🕑 Added 2022-01-29 16:12:22 +0000 UTC I was supposed to have an Ayahuasca ceremony for my birthday, but the universe had different plans. And instead I got C0v|d 🙃 A former version of me would have been very disappointed by this. And to say there aren’t some low feelings would be a lie. But over the last few years I have felt my patience and acceptance of what is become less of an idea that I embrace and more of a truth that I can actually live. Going fast & being in control used to be non-negotiable for me. It’s a great way to get things done and be sure you don’t enjoy the subtleties while they’re happening. Being stripped of external freedom has allowed me to find so much more of it inside. So as I sat alone in my room and knew that all my other friends at this facility were deep in another dimension, I felt no sadness. Only immense gratitude that I can, for the first time in a long time, be alone with myself and enjoy it. Especially without weed. It was a great gift both from the medicine and from myself. I fully know and believe you don’t always have to ingest to take messages from trips - and I got a lot out of last night without drinking a drop. A patience practice I kept running away from because I hate being bad at things has been rope. It’s taken two years for it to start to feel fluid in my fingers. And almost just as long to commit this particular tie to memory. But now it’s in there. It’s not just a concept I observe - but something I can do and feel. And I’m seeking more of that on this next trip around the sun.
